Archive for February, 2005
Join me?
Posted on February 25, 2005, by soph, under It's a Girl's Life, Reading and Writing.
One of the infinite number of things I love about life - learning new, amazing things everyday. The world is such a fascinating place. For instance, read this.
I know for many of us, the thought of joining something we haven’t a clue about would be considered nothing short of foolishness and madness. But obviously, there are many others who would disagree. Is it an Asian mentality? You tell me. I don’t even know that I would do it myself.
But what about something we do have a clue about then? Would you join this? Unlike the former, this doesn’t require a passport photograph of yourself. You just well, post a tag on her blog, or drop me a comment on mine.
It’s a pity the non-Melburnians will be missing out on the balloons though.
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This Ache
Posted on February 22, 2005, by soph, under God.
I want to say much, but I dont know what to say. Not because I don’t have anything to say, but perhaps because I am just tired of saying it. Besides, how do you put into words the relentless waves of the sea? How do you describe the strong unpredictable current beneath, or explain the calm nonchalance of its lapping surface?
I can’t believe I’m comparing myself to a mass of salty water. But as the waves are relentless, so my frustrations come forth and recede. The emotions suppressed, the passion fast abating, the cynicism so worrying, are the currents that drive the sea. Can cynicism and passion co-exist? I feel it is just a matter of time before the latter is replaced with apathy.
After all, it is not in my nature to want to win the debates, neither is it my character to let them dictate my life. I have had enough of that. I choose to follow my heart, and if in doing so, I am forced to argue with persistence or walk away in apathy, then I will choose the latter. I am tired of repeating the same things, I am tired of frustration. Now I just want to soothe the ache.
I never really understood what they meant when they spoke of an ache for community, or an ache for people to be real in church. Now I do. I ache for empathy and not defensiveness, love and not superficiality, God in my life and not the god who only resides in the building they call church. I ache for a community who are not afraid to tackle the hard issues, who are not caught up in self-imposed legalism, who are not constantly trying to dress, talk or act like “good Christians” and judging those who do not join in their efforts.
In retrospect I realize this is a gradually dawning realization over the past 5 years, but where before I had no name to call it by, I now loosely term it: cultural christianity.
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Thoughts in my head.
Posted on February 21, 2005, by soph, under Uncategorized.
Random muse of the weekend:
Is the rich culture and immense talent of the African people a result of the racial oppression that they faced and continue to face, or is it God’s sense of humour that the most racially oppressed people should also be the most musically gifted, athletically able and physically beautiful in the world? Or do I just have nothing better to do? (Yuchun reckons it’s the third.)
Random challenge of the weekend:
Name the 51 administrative states/districts of America.
California, Nevada, Nebraska, Texas, Ohio, Oklahoma, New Orleans, Iowa, Idaho, Illinois, Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, New York, Rhode Island, Massachussetts, Florida, Virginia, West Virginia, South Carolina, North Carolina, North Dakota, South Dakota, Philadelphia, Pensylvannia, Oregon, Denver, District of Columbia, Hawaii, Maine, Maryland, Kansas, New Mexico, Colorado… I’m stuck.
Random question of the weekend:
Do the actions of a person make them “cool”, or do we judge their actions by whether or not we perceive them to be “cool”? For example, A did this, which is totally not cool. Therefore, A is uncool. B is cool, but B did the same thing. Therefore, it is okay because B is cool. What gives?
Random question of the season:
How did an entire church develop a culture of “doing church” when their much-loved and respected pastors are not like that? Where does a mentality come from and how do they develop? Was the moon blue yesterday because there was actually a fast song during worship? Like, a really fast one, not one of those in-between pseudo speedy types.
Oops, guess that was more than just one question.
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Interview with Dallas Willard
Posted on February 17, 2005, by soph, under God.
“The level of intelligence in our sermons, the abysmal story telling that you hear constantly is just hopeless. The power that comes through the Bible itself, which is the most intelligent book ever written, is lost.” - Dallas Willard, in an interview with Relevant Magazine.
For the entire interview, go here. Thanks to him, who took the time to say, “I hear you. I’m listening.”
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My commemoration of St. Valentine
Posted on February 15, 2005, by soph, under Hanging Out.
It so does not feel like Chinese New Year anymore, and it’s only the 7th day. Give us another generation or two and it will become a 2 day affair instead of a festive 15. Does anyone still celebrate Chap Goh Meh (the 15th day) to mark the end of Chinese New Year?
For a double dose of red, it was Valentine’s Day yesterday. Red roses and hearts to go with the red lanterns and ang pows (red packets).
No, Yuchun and I did not set us up a little candle light dinner in some fancy restaurant. We spent the early part of the evening playing with Jordan, trying to catch his only trick - fetch a tennis ball - on film, washing him off after he stepped on his own poop, and shouting at him for peeing in the house. Well, actually it was just Yuchun who was doing the shouting. Oh and for those not in the know, Jordan is the new love in my life, and Yuchun’s 2 month old Golden Retriever.
It is official. I cannot own dogs. I can live with them, I can play with them, I can even feed them, but I cannot clean up after them, train them and scold them. The cute ones are too adorable to smack and the not-so-cute ones are just not worth having. I’m a cute-ist. So sue me.
I am bored in the office. While rants and raves silently scream in my head for the right to expression, I just can’t bring myself to put them together into a coherent article. Maybe tomorrow. Like, if I am still really, really bored.
Back to Valentine’s Day. In an unintended act of subversion, 7 of us got together at Chillis 1 Utama last night amidst all the lovey-dovey couples and (obviously) did not order the over-priced Valentine’s day Special Deal. (Did you know some restaurants only serve Valentine’s Day sets? How very silly is that?) The topic of conversation turned to questions such as:
If you could be a sports star, what sport would you be a star at?
If you were an animal, what would you want to be?
If you could have any job in the world, what would you do?
If you were a superhero, which one would you be?
Not very romantic, but fascinating nonetheless.
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CNN Interview with America’s Most Influential Evangelicals
Posted on February 14, 2005, by soph, under God, Web Stuff.
If you are interested…
http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0502/01/lkl.01.html
It’s a pretty good read I assure you.
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Playing pretend.
Posted on February 13, 2005, by soph, under God.
“At Sunday worship, as in every dimension of our existence, many of us pretend to believe we are sinners. Consequently, all we can do is pretend to believe we have been forgiven. As a result, our whole spiritual life is pseudo-repentance and pseudo-bliss.” - Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel
I am Guilty as Charged.
How many of us really believe we are scum? It is so much easier to compare ourselves to the rest of the world and think that even though we are sinners, we aren’t all that bad. The temptation is always there to say “at least…”. At least we don’t rob. At least we don’t rape. At least we go to church. Bollocks.
I want to believe I’m scum.
And even right now, when I am frustrated, impatient, rebellious, struggling and wanting nothing more than to tell people exactly what I think of them when I either don’t have the guts or know I shouldn’t, (which makes me more frustrated, impatient and rebellious in a never-ending cycle), a part of me still whispers, “but I’m still not that bad.”
Dammit.
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Five days. Ten points.
Posted on February 13, 2005, by soph, under Hanging Out.
After 5 days and 7 hours in a traffic jam extending from Penang to Kuala Lumpur, I am exhilarated to be back. My sisters are insanely jealous that I will not be embarking on anymore of these Chinese New Year balik kampung (back to hometown) trips after this year, thanks to my impending marriage. After 23 consecutive years, I am absolutely thrilled.
The following is composed of random thoughts pertaining to my trip, in the simplest and most efficient format I can think of - point-form:
1. My uncle’s house has so many mosquitoes it’s probably illegal. The heat didn’t help, though I did manage to get a sun tan of sorts. My red shoulders are still sore and it’s been 3 days.
2. My uncle’s Presybyterian church had a Chinese New Year service. They got their youth - all 10 of them, to sing the congregation a song. No one, and I mean not a single person, clapped. My sister and I were shocked. No one who says “Breast (blessed) New Year” should be allowed to take the microphone.
3. Highlight number one: The Amazing Race 2 hour finale. Freddy and Kendra’s victory is proof that the toughest do not always win.
4. Highlight number two: watching Alfie, Closer and Super-Sized Me. Jude Law is seriously adorable.
5. Highlight number three: seeing my cousin starting afresh and praising God today after going through job struggles, rumoured drug addiction and marriage problems. A very big highlight this.
6. Catching up with Mun Keong, Faye and Daniel Wan. Having dinner with Benny. The four of them are perhaps the only reason why I came back sane.
7. Prince Charles is finally getting married to Camilla Parker-Bowles. Interesting how the polls show a vast majority of Brits are against a divorced king, but have no problems with divorce themselves.
8. My sister’s friend’s dad passed away on the second day of Chinese New Year. I do not know him.
9. My granddad - almost 90, half deaf, slightly senile - apologized for not being able to attend my wedding because he can no longer travel, and pressed an extra ang pow into my hands. His best wishes made me want to cry like no other “congratulations” has. Yuchun has promised that we will go back to Penang so my granddad can meet my husband.
10. Playing blackjack with my sisters, mum, brother and cousin - and winning. I feel bad that my 13 year cousin lost the most but we did try to prevent her from playing, and asked her to stop. Repeatedly. I am of course pleased with my winnings nevertheless.
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Year of the Chicken
Posted on February 7, 2005, by soph, under Hanging Out.
It’s Chinese New Year again, and this time round, it’s the chicken’s year of glory. Some would object to that statement, preferring instead to think of 2005 as the year of the rooster as opposed to a chick or a hen, but it’s not like we have the year of the sheep as opposed to that of the ram, or the year of the dog instead of the year of the bitch. Or do we? Besides, roosters may make for more colourful pictures, but chicks are cute. And we have colourful chicks nowadays too.
So here’s to a year of clucks, crows, and cheeps. May we treasure every cheep, rejoice in many crows and share our many clucks.
And here’s to a particularly special “chicken” I love:
It’s unusually bold, loud and colourful. It stands out wherever you put it. To appreciate it you might have to take a different perspective, but if you take a step back and look past the imperfections, you’ll see that it actually is kinda cute.
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Christian culture speak.
Posted on February 4, 2005, by soph, under God.
My fifth of the day. I believe this is a personal record of sorts. It tells you that a) I’m really free and need more things to do at work; b) I’m on a roll; c) I’ve been hoarding thoughts for blogging. Well, I’ve already offered help so…
Anyway, I’ve been thinking about cliched Christian phrases. You know, “holy jargon” that we use because we feel it’s the right thing to say but don’t really mean it too much, or phrases that we hear others say and it’s become so ingrained in our Christian culture that we say it without a second thought.
For example, the classic “I’ll pray for you”. When someone comes to you with a problem, that is what we say. Many times we mean it with all our hearts and we really do keep our word, but just as many times we say it because it’s “the right thing to say” and we forget all about it the minute we turn away. Sometimes a person needs more than just to hear you say that you’ll perform heartened appeals on their behalf, they might just be looking for someone to say “I’m here for you”. Or “I understand”. It might even be better to say honestly “I don’t know what to say/do, but I’m here.”
So help me out. I’m trying to think of other cliched Christian phrases that I’m trying to weed out of my system so I will only say things I genuinely mean.
Contributions anyone?
