Posts from ‘November, 2009’

My online maternity shopping find: motherhood.com

Nov 30th, 2009
by soph.
2 comments

Having tried (and failed miserably) to locate a decent pair of maternity jeans in all this land, I finally gave up and turned to the Internet. I wanted a pair of good quality maternity jeans that were comfy, well-cut and didn’t make me look three inches shorter and ten kilos heavier, but stores that I visited either had no more sizes or had never heard of such a thing. And don’t even get me started on shorts. Apparently, pregnant women in this country only wear bermudas.

So in desperation and determination, I looked up “best maternity jeans” on Google. After some clicking, reading and ooh-ing, I finally settled on this US site, www.motherhood.com. Their maternity jeans came highly recommended, they did international shipping (and tracking!), and they were reasonably priced. I picked out a bunch of items, took a deep breath and keyed in my details. That was on a Friday evening.

Then I waited. And this is the part where it gets a tad embarrassing. Having lost my shopping once, I confess to checking the status of my orders almost every day once I got my tracking numbers. Luckily, the items only took six days to arrive. Six! When I got a call from the courier delivery guy saying he was at my office with the packages, I literally jumped for joy. And I haven’t jumped in over four months.

Hubby had been worried about the clothes fitting well but I am overly pleased to say that everything fit perfectly. The maternity jeans even came in petite sizes for women under 5’4″ (that’s me!) so I didn’t have to alter the length like I usually do. Here’s what I got:

$20.99 = RM71

$20.99 = RM71

$20.99 = RM71

$40.98 = RM139

$45.98 = RM156

The shorts and the jeans cost more because of the Secret Fit Belly feature but given how impossible it is to find nice maternity shorts here, plus the fact that most maternity jeans and pants cost around that price anyway, I am super pleased with my find. Prices include shipping costs. All photos from motherhood.com.

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Posted in: Pregnancy.

This November, please be grateful. Thank you

Nov 27th, 2009
by soph.
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As the Americans recover from their Thanksgiving dinners, I am thankful that today is a public holiday for me as Muslims celebrate Hari Raya Aidiladha. I am thankful for the long weekend and I am thankful that I have far more to be thankful for than I can possibly list. And believe me, I am very good at making lists.

When I was growing up, my father taught me to be grateful for everything I had and my mother taught me the importance of saying please and thank you. It’s a habit (lifestyle?) I hope to pass on to my kid. To my mother, saying please and thank you was probably more about good manners but to me, it’s also about respect. I say please and thank you to everyone because I think everyone deserves respect – from my boss to my maid to the guy who collects my garbage – and this is my small way of showing it on a regular basis.

One of the traits that I admire the most in people isn’t their determination or their talent although those are wonderful things to emulate and to have, it is the ability to treat everybody with respect and to treat everybody the same. I admire it because I don’t see it very often and I wish I could say I look at every single person equally but the truth is, sometimes I don’t. I am distracted by status, race, age, appearance… the many things that consciously or unconsciously influence how we behave towards other people. So I’m working on it and I probably will for a long time.

Oh dear and this was supposed to be a post about being thankful. You know all those stories about starving African children that parents always repeat when their kids won’t finish their food? Well, it worked on me. Whining and complaining was something my father did not look kindly upon. Don’t like your dinner? Think about all the starving children who don’t even have food to eat. Whining about homework? You should be so lucky to have the opportunity to go to school and get a good education.

You’d think this sort of thing repeated over, I don’t know, 20 years would have made me quite immune to it, but instead, it’s stuck. I find myself saying the same thing on occasion to my youngest siblings and sounding about 40 years old in the process. I’ll probably say the same thing to my kid. But I really think being grateful is so important. It puts things into perspective and shows me what a whiny brat I’m being.

So today, I’m going to take several moments to remember all the things I’m thankful for. From this laptop I’m tapping away on to my husband who still refuses to get up even though it’s noon. From the baby that’s kicking inside of me to our families who I know might spend the next 20 years telling us how to bring him or her up. For my many, many blessings, I am grateful.

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Posted in: Parenting.

Today, a beautiful calm

Nov 23rd, 2009
by soph.
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The Saturday morning is cool, calm, quiet. I hear only the sound of leaves rustling in the trees as the wind blows. In a moment of quietness, a bird chirps. I take it as a sign that God is listening. The bird does not chirp again.

I had planned to watch DVDs in bed but there is something so rare and so peaceful about the trees and the wind outside my balcony doors that I find myself compelled to stay on in the living room. Just for a little bit longer. I take deep breaths and stare outside often, as if I am somehow trying to capture and immortalise this beautiful calm within me. I have spent many weekend mornings here alone, but today, something is different.

Today, I feel peace. I am relaxed, content. I hesitate to turn on the television because that would break the quiet. I want only to hear the trees and feel the breeze that wafts in through the open sliding doors. So I read a little bit. And then I write. Because it seems like the right thing to do.

Today, I feel peace. And I am grateful. I am reminded of the things that truly matter and suddenly, all my concerns and niggling frustrations seem so insignificant and unimportant. Perhaps if I wait a little longer, they will melt away. Perhaps if I sit here somemore, I will be able to bottle this up and take it everywhere with me.

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Posted in: Daily Events.

21 Weeks: I have nothing to wear!

Nov 20th, 2009
by soph.
11 comments

The first few months, everyone commented on how small I was and how I was hardly showing and wow, you can still fit into your jeans. Then, practically overnight it feels like, my baby bump popped out and suddenly I can’t seem to fit into anything! My wardrobe has been whittled down to four pairs of pants, two of which are stretchy sports bottoms and one of which I can just pull off with the help of a belly band (for the uninitiated, this is what a belly band looks like).

I have never needed to go shopping so badly, I assure you.

And this is what I’m starting to realise: maternity clothing options in this country are really, really limited (even the belly band took me ages to find!) and, generally, expensive. As compared to (nicer) stuff that’s available overseas. Sometimes even when you take into account the exchange rate and shipping costs.

Unfortunately, many of the stores in the UK or USA don’t ship to Malaysia. I found this great Australian site Bump Baby & Beyond that stocks quality, gorgeous stuff at unbelievably reasonable prices and that ships to Malaysia, but there’s no tracking service available and my parcel went missing!

Cath from BB&B was amazing – my order was processed in a blink but after waiting two months, we finally conceded that my clothes weren’t going to arrive and she gave me a full refund within days. I was really impressed and relieved (thanks, Cath!) if terribly disappointed that I wasn’t going to get my stuff after all. If someone’s taken the items, I have just one thing to say to you for stealing from a pregnant woman: karma.

So now it looks like I’m limited to only overseas sites that offer courier delivery to Malaysia and local options. While I await an opportune moment to hit up stores like Topshop maternity and Modern Mum for basics, I have been doing plenty of online shopping – here’s a site I visit regularly – buying oversized tops mostly. They’re cheap (which means I can buy more!) and I intend to wear these for as long as I can before turning to maternity options.

I know I don’t need an entirely new wardrobe, just a handful of bottoms, lots of tops and a couple of nicer things maybe. I already have a bunch of accessories and this is a wonderful excuse to buy flats and sandals. Oh and I’ve been advised to get a bag that I can carry satchel-style because snatch thieves tend to target visibly pregnant women and that should deter them. Hubby isn’t convinced though; he reckons a bag that slings across my shoulders could prove more dangerous if I’m targeted. I’m still undecided.

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Posted in: Pregnancy.

Why do Asian starlets like talking about their weight?

Nov 18th, 2009
by soph.
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As someone who gets to interview celebrities – thanks to my job – I’ve had the privilege of chatting with some of the most talented and interesting people I’ll ever meet. As someone who also reads, speaks and writes Mandarin – thanks to my dad who insisted upon my Chinese education – I couldn’t help noticing something the other day: Asian starlets like talking about their weight loss.

Now I don’t mean when they are asked a direct question about it because that would be unfair, but in the last few months, I’ve read at least two press releases with paragraphs devoted to how much weight a particular rising starlet has lost. And I recently interviewed a budding singer who cites her biggest career regret as eating so much that she now has to lose weight. Really?

I understand these aspiring youngsters have a certain physical appearance they need to achieve, especially in the Chinese music industry where the average wannabe star weighs about 45kg or less, but honestly, it makes it just a tad difficult for me to take them seriously when, out of all the things they could be talking about in order to establish themselves as artistes, they choose to announce their weight.

Besides, I’m pretty sure many of the other singers and actresses face the same pressures daily and most of them actually have more important things to talk about and would like to avoid the topic, thank you very much.

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Posted in: Celebrities.

To support or not? A moral doggy dilemma

Nov 16th, 2009
by soph.
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I live in a gated community and one of the rules we have is no pets. A few days ago I got a letter from one of the residents asking if anyone would support her petition to abolish the no-pets rule. She says she’s got a dog that she never lets out of the house and she doesn’t see why she can’t keep it. She also claims her agent told her pets were allowed when she got her unit even though it’s stated otherwise in the sales and purchase agreement. Maybe she didn’t read it. Or, as hubby brought up, maybe she’s bluffing. (The thought did not even occur to me.)

This was my initial dilemma: while I am sympathetic – she has been told she needs to give her dog away – the fact that the rule was stated in the sales and purchase agreement means she doesn’t have an excuse, even if her agent did misinform her. On the other hand, while I am hesitant to voice my support, I am aware of other people who secretly keep dogs and just have never been found out and I don’t have a problem with it at all.

I say it “was” a dilemma because hubby and I have decided we cannot support the petition. Even if a little voice asks me if I’m being biased or a hypocrite. What would you have done?

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Posted in: Daily Events.

12 Weeks: Just about the size of my thumb. Or so I’ve been told

Nov 8th, 2009
by soph.
6 comments

Look at that! Did you know a foetus is almost fully formed by the time it’s just 12 weeks old? (I didn’t.) It’s got fingers and toes, eyelids, fingernails… everything. Not that you can see it on the ultrasound but it’s just amazing if you think about it.

This is our baby at around 12 weeks. The doctor was quick to assure us a foetus’ head usually grows faster than the rest of the body at this stage; not that we were worried. I was still trying to get over the fact that this complicated, mindblowing, living thing you see is only about the size of my thumb.

Y has really taken to coming to the doc’s with me for my monthly checkups. When we did this one, he even whipped out his iPhone to record the ultrasound process because he wanted to capture our little one moving. I never thought my husband would be one of those camera-wielding fathers but it looks as if I just might have one on my hands. He’s even threatening suggesting he bring a video camera into the delivery room!

[Originally written: 15 September 2009]

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Posted in: Pregnancy.

Oh, the sneaky little things men do…

Nov 4th, 2009
by soph.
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Some months ago, hubby had a Samsung Omnia. It used to drive me crazy because it didn’t always ring when there was an incoming call, and few things annoy me as easily and quickly as hubby repeatedly not answering his phone (what if there’s an emergency?!).

After a while, hubby finally conceded that the phone must be “faulty” and that he needed a new one. So he got the iPhone. End of story, right? Wrong.

A couple of weeks ago, my phone started falling apart. It’s nothing major; the casing’s coming off so one side of the keypad sort of sinks lower than the other. It irritated me at first (I’m used to it now) and because I’ve been lusting after the iPhone or something similar, I told hubby about it.

He said sure we can get me a new phone, and then one evening, he suggested, “Why don’t you use my old Omnia? It’s kinda like the iPhone.”

“I thought it doesn’t work properly,” I said. “It doesn’t always ring when people call.”

“I’ll reset the phone. That should fix it.”

Pause.

“Then why didn’t you do that in the first place instead of buying an iPhone?”

Silence.

Then, “Err… I just thought of it?”

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Posted in: Marriage.