Sometime last week, I sort of lost my temper at Y while at my in-laws’. I almost never do that, and the problem with being so easygoing/reserved in general is that people tend to panic and overreact at the first sign of emotion from me. That night, they saw emotion. Believe me, if I’d really lost my temper it would not have been so mild.
The following day, when it was just me and my in-laws, my father-in-law basically suggested that if Y came home from work in a bad mood, I should leave him alone. I’m sure he meant it in a peacemaking kind of way – he did say it so very, very nicely – but he also said: “Sometimes we men, when we have a bad day at work…”
My first thought was, “Excuse me, but I’m over seven months pregnant and working full-time, but I still don’t think it would be fair for me to come home and give Y attitude just because I had a bad day.” But I didn’t say anything. Or rather, I didn’t say anything to express my disagreement. Probably because my father-in-law said it so nicely, and because I’m generally a non-confrontational person unless you’re my immediate family or my husband.
After I got home, however, I got really annoyed at the chauvinistic implications of that remark. The more I thought about it, the more frustrated I got – not so much at my father-in-law, but at myself for not saying anything. And the more I stewed in my frustration, the more worked-up I became. The worst part was, I didn’t know if I was overreacting because of all the pregnancy hormones (I’ve been on the look-out for mood swings since day one) or if it really was as big a deal as I was quickly making it out to be.
So I did what I do best – write. I sat down at my laptop and started to write this post. I got as far as the second paragraph… and my frustration completely dissipated. I contemplated deleting everything since I was no longer annoyed, but decided to keep at it. And the more I wrote, the calmer I felt and the more convinced I became that, yes, it was those hormones after all.
I was initially going to title this post, “This will teach me to be so damn un-confrontational.” Then I thought I’d make it about how I was no longer upset about my father-in-law’s remark because I understand and appreciate the fact that he meant well. Now, I think it’s about how my pregnancy hormones are (finally) kicking in and screwing with me because, as hubby will testify, it’s been pretty peaceful so far. (Thank God for that.)
I think it’s normal to have your mood swings abit, so long you get over it after awhile. I think you made a right choice, do something you would enjoy, and after a short while, you will find yourself feeling much better!
Yes, I was surprised at how quickly my mood changed. So this is what being temperamental feels like.