“More often than not, a mother’s personal needs and desires are unselfishly placed a distant second. But as mothers, we should encourage each other to overcome the guilt of occasionally meeting some of our own personal needs.”
- Mother: Guilty as Charged, Chicken Soup for the Working Mom’s Soul
Too true. I have been making a conscious effort to carve out “me” time, no matter how tiny a sliver. It’s only been four months into this motherhood thing and already, I can see how quickly and easily each day melts into the next, and the next, and before I know it, a month has passed.
Right now, meeting my personal needs means getting out occasionally without first convincing myself it’s an emergency to appease my guilt about leaving baby with my mum in law and/or her maid. It means maintaining some semblance of fitness by hitting the treadmill when I can, even if it’s just 30 minutes a week (or less!). And it means working away from home sometimes. I love working at home but I also love those days when I’m in the office. I miss being around like-minded human beings, the noise and the conversation.
I went shopping by myself a couple of weeks ago, the first time since Kaylin arrived, and I even squeezed in a trip to the hairstylist’s two weeks before that. He wanted to know why I always look like a disaster (his words, not mine) everytime I walk in but that’s beside the point. One day, I will get round to that pedicure, a massage and maybe even a movie.
Hey Sophia being a first time mum myself I remember when I had those guilty feelings whenever I had to leave my baby behind. He is now 5mths old and I still get that guilty feeling. Even though I work, I can still count the number of times I’ve gone out without my baby. It’s slowly getting better now as I try to steal a lunch or two over the weekend with the husband even if it’s only for an hour. Right now I’m working towards a movie… I’ve not been to the cinema’s in almost 9mths….sigh. It’s tough especially when you’re breastfeeding (although I’m not exclusive because I can’t seem to pump enough milk to last him the day). But honestly for our sanity we need that little me time…so don’t feel so bad in fact it will benefit your baby more… at least he/she knows that mummy will not suddenly turn amok!!
Hello Joanne,
Oh my gosh, I don’t remember the last movie I saw in a cinema. Thanks for sharing. I know these feelings are normal but it’s always good to hear it from another first-time mum. Here’s to that elusive movie, may it come sooner rather than later :)